Healthy Happy Chaos

The human mind and the entire life process is chaotic. Chaos is not something that lacks order; chaos has varieties of order within it

Frederick Lenz

Does anyone else ever feel like they have lost control when they look around their house and there is stuff EVERYWHERE and you feel like you just cleaned??? I mean seriously! Why can’t it just stay clean for like 10 minutes? But you know what, I believe I am part of the problem because I have such a high level of anxiety and when I see things out of place my mind goes absolutely CRAZY!!! My anxiety got so bad a number of years back that I had to be put on anxiety/depression meds to help me cope. Tried to get off of them and had a super bad relapse. Thought that was literally the end for me because the doctor at the time said that I was going to have to be on meds for the rest of my life. I was 27-28 at the time. Wow! What a wake up call for me, right? Wrong! I accepted it because it runs in my family. I mean, what choice did I really have but to accept the inevitable? Hubby and I decided to try for another child a couple years later. Now is when I had the wake up call! Two kids, husband, full time (and then some) job, work trips, fitting in some time for working out, home cooked meals, keeping a clean house, schoolwork to finish my degree, volunteering. I mean, WHOA!!! What the heck was I thinking? I had to be the perfect person in this soooo not perfect world and do it all. I had a to do list a mile long and was always busy, but at the end of the day I didn’t feel like I had actually accomplished anything. What was I spending my time doing???? Then it hit me that my health needed to become a priority or things were going to always be high stress in my mind. I needed to figure out ways to make my health a priority and balance with my crazy life because in all honesty, I couldn’t give any of it up or let any of it slide. But how?

I began researching all the tips and tricks I could find. How to eat healthier, quick workouts that gave me the same outcome as the longer ones, how to organize your house to make things flow more efficiently, quick family friendly meals. I did all the things and still felt like I wasn’t doing what I needed to make my ‘health’ better. It was actually creating more stress for me and my life just couldn’t handle it. Then a friend introduced me to the 30 Days to Healthy Living Program with Arbonne. I of course had my doubts, but why not try one more thing. You know what happened? I got hooked because of the sheer simplicity of the program. It was all outlined for me and all i had to do was some grocery shopping and cooking meals each night, which took less than 30 mins!!! That was it for me. I started down a path that has forever changed me and the best part is that I have found ways to involve my family. So, we are spending more time together and be happier and healthier together. It has been pretty darn amazing!

The more and more I talk to others, the more I realize just how important balance is in this chaotic world. There are days when the easy answer can become the more common answer. One night of grabbing fast food on the way home is ok, but if you find yourself doing it most or all nights then you are off balance. I know, I know. Cooking healthy meals requires grocery shopping, meal prep, and time to prepare. Working, parenting, social life, school, etc. It all takes time out of our day and we feel like we just do not have enough time in our day to do it all, right? But guess what I found? A way to incorporate some of those things with each other! We do grocery shopping together as a family on Sundays. We swing by a coffee shop and everyone gets ‘coffee’ and then we literally have fun getting the grocery shopping done together. Hopefully you are reading this and thinking “Wow, why didn’t I think of that?!?!”, because when I finally figured it out I was kicking myself for not doing it sooner. Then we all work turn music on when we get home and work together to meal prep and put away groceries. It is fun and we are spending time together while getting grocery shopping done. We do that with cleaning the house and working out. We spend quality time together and get things done that are important. Now that isn’t our only form of fun. We are a board game kind of family, and spend most weekends playing games. We also do a lot of adventures like hiking, indoor rock climbing, park time. It’s a family affair and it teaches our boys how to have a good time and still be responsible.

What we choose to do with our time is our choice. I firmly believe that, but I also believe that you cannot complain about not having enough time to do what you need to for your health when you are not willing to find the balance. Many times I have heard people say they wish they had more time to workout but then they will spend hours watching tv. Or they wish they could go back to school and finish a degree but aren’t willing to give up some of their night life. Just remember that if you really want to be healthier, work out more, sleep better, spend more time with your kids, etc….you will make it happen. You will prioritize it, and one lesson learned, do it before it is too late. Make a list of what is truly important to you right now in life and long term. Once I had my second child I realized I wanted to show my boys how to be happy, healthy, and full of life. Not always stressed, working towards being my own boss, and just being happy. Balanced!!

There are so many books and articles on finding balance but they all have the same general guidelines.

1. Turn it off – electronics and social media are really bogging down our minds. Have you watched the Social Dilemma on Netflix? Insert mind blown emoji. It is crazy what social media platforms are doing to us!!! When was the last time you just set your phone/computer down and didn’t touch it for an hour or two??? Insert why we play board games. No electronics and we all just disconnect. Your brain needs a rest!!! Try it out on your next day off or maybe at the end of the day before you go to bed.
2. “Say no to everything that is either not essential or doesn’t add something valuable to your life.” – Life saver right here. I used to tell everyone yes all the time whenever they asked something of me. I found it impossible to say no. It took my plate becoming overflowed by double and I was having panic attacks on a regular basis before I finally said no. I even learned to tell my own mind no. Example, I hate having things all over the house. Clutter bugs me, however, there was one night I put the boys to bed and was about to clean up the entire house and it dawned on me, It literally would not hurt my family or me if I didn’t clean up. Why it took me so many years to figure that out, I don’t know.

3. Reduce negativity – It is impossible to eliminate negativity all together, but we can reduce the negative influences in our lives. If you know that there is one particular person on your social media feed that causes you to feel crummy or brings your down when you see their posts, snooze them. You don’t have to delete them as a friend, but you can hide their posts so they don’t pop up on your news feed. That way it isn’t thrown in your face. Find positive influences to engage with daily, It’s amazing how a simple smile from someone can make us feel better, even if just for a little while.

4. Acknowledge that you are not superhuman and cannot do it all!!! This is a hard one for us all. We want to be invincible, we want to be the heroes, we want to be able to do it all. But it’s sooooo not healthy. We get tired, strung out, and just beat down by trying to do it all. The healthiest thing we can do for ourselves is just accept that we can’t do it all. Nothing more to it!!

• Always need to give credit where credit is due. When I have thoughts go through my head and I start talking about them I am researching and reading all kinds of things.
• How To Get Your Life Back Into Balance – Centerstone
• 10 Simple Ways to Find Balance and Get Your Life Back (lifehack.org)

Well, took me a few days, nope over a week, to get this next post done. Leaving a deployed location and reintegrating with my family was not a smooth adventure. Takes time and wears a person down. Time change adjustments, 24+ hours of traveling on minimal sleep, and becoming mommy again, all within a 48 hour window. Whoa! It has been a lot but you know what? I am so glad to be back home with all my boys. Talk about chaos and finding the balance within.